There once was a man who was caught cheating on his wife,
And so, in her rage, she grabbed a butcher knife.
But she didn't go after him, no siree Bob!
It was the woman, she believed, who needed the knife job.
"Please don't hurt me, I'm sorry, I didn't know he was married!" she screamed,
"Breaking up a marriage, helping a man cheat, I'd have never dreamed..."
"Liar! Whore! Bitch!" the wife screamed with rage, knife clenched tight,
"Next you'll tell me it wasn't what it seemed, I shouldn't trust my sight."
"Not at all," the woman said, trembling, sweat dripping from her brow.
"Please, tell her how you told me you were single! Please! Now!"
He saw his wife, ready to kill and said "Babe, she's lying, she totally knew,
But she seduced me, I was helpless, you know I only love you."
The woman's heart dropped.... And before his wife even moved the knife,
The woman said, voice harsh, "I'm already dead then, do take my life.
Your husband told me he was single, and we began to date,
A few weeks later he told me he loved me, yet now I feel only hate,
For he told me of wonderful dreams of a house, car and kids,
Yet now I see them for what they truly were, harsh, cold fibs.
So go ahead and kill me, strike true, destroy these lies,
For a life without his love will simply never be enough." As tears fell from her eyes.
The husband, the cheater, the liar, the bastard stepped in,
"Now honey, I know that this woman committed such a terrible sin...
But I need you too badly for you to be sent to jail,
Where you'd be someone's bitch, not even a male's...
And although conjugal visits would be really really hot
After you being manhandled by a hot lesbian cellmate a whole lot,
Shes just a stupid girl, so please put the knife down,
Cause she's just not worth it, ha ha look at her frown!"
The woman ran from the house as she cried and cried,
And mere months later found the love of her life, although she hadn't even tried.
They lived a life together happier than either could ever have imagined,
And she felt forever forgiven, as her new hubby showed her how she hadn't even sinned.
But what about the liar, the bastard, the coldhearted cheat?
Well, he made passes at damn near every girl he did meet!
And every time his wife caught him it was always the same,
She was mad at the innocent girl, not the man who couldn't keep his parts tame.
The moral of the story?
If your man, or woman, is cheating on you
Then boot them out of your life with your sharpest, heaviest shoe
For a liar and cheater knows exactly what they do,
WHO they do, and obviously don't care about you.
Don't take your anger out on who it is they've done it with, no way!
For its your guy, or your gal, who's gotta hit the highway.
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