PaD 8/365: The Budget Game

Okay, so this is another of those "not about her but totally inspired by her" poems, where "her" is the awesome Wanda of course. I figure this can be helpful for ANYONE getting out on their own though, since budgeting can be so scary. Once I learn to play an instrument, I plan on putting it to music too

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THE BUDGET GAME

So you're ready to go and live on your own?
Well, sorry to say, there's one thing left to do.
It sucks, I know, but don't bitch or moan,
Because I wrote this poem juuuuust for yoooooouuuuuuuuuu!

.......

I sure hope you make plenty of money,
If you don't, it's about to get funny.
You take what you make and subtract what you pay,
That's how you do it the budgeting way!

Find out what you make a month, that's four weeks to you,
Some months get five weeks, during those just go WHOOO!
Then you take what you spend and take that much away,
And whatever's left is what you can use to play.

Now, calm down, I'll make sure you won't fudge it!
Here's a partial list of what to budget.
But if you do things like netflix or subscribe to pornography
Then it's up to you to add those in, not me.

When you start the budget, make sure that rent is first,
And then certainly electricity, these two are the worst.
Sometimes you need garbage collection and water paid too,
As many places count these with rent, which is sure rude!

Next come groceries, you've got to eat, don't forget.
And if you still owe on your car, you've gotta pay that debt.
And don't forget that you need to pay your car insurance
If you do, and you get into an accident, they'll take your pants!

Then there's automobile fuel and your phone bill,
Whether it's a cell phone or land line, your money you must spill.
I'd strongly suggest renter's or homeowners insurance, just in case,
So if your house suddenly explodes, your stuff will be replaced.

And if you like TV, cable is necessary!
Make sure you get the right package, since tastes can vary.
Oh, and budget for random entertainment stuff also
Better make it at least double if you've got yourself a beau.

If you really wanna get specific, throw in clothes
And I guess that a few of you would need to budget hos.
The final thing that anyone needs is an emergency reserve,
Because being both stranded and broke is something no one deserves.

So remember when you go to spend that measly buck,
This poem that you read online, by a guy named Chuck.
Make sure it's in the budget or be prepared to fail
Because it takes a solid will if you're going to prevail.